Need Suggestions about how to deal with husband?

I can't get my husband to share responsibilities in the home. Not the care of our 2 children , not housework , but he sure is willing to share MY MONEY. I may not make as much money as he does , but half of my total income goes into the rent. I run my own Business from home (as i did before i ever had a husband and children), Now I have 2 small children , an apartment that is too small and a husband who won;t help with anything. If he does a load of laundry , or a single load of dishes i am supposed to praise him and give thanks to him like he is a god. The Only thing he does consistently is cook dinner . WHich he likes doing , but he always leaves a huge mess. I work nonstop my Business , my kids , cleaning up after him and the kids, i never get to rest , never get to even take a walk by myself (On the weekends i ask him to watch the kids and all he does is huff and i have to worry because one kid or another gets neglected,Not fed , not changed , left alone to rifle through cabinets, he "forgets" to put up gates).I can't go to the store by myself. I cannot even use the bathroom with the door closed because i have to watch the kids. How do i deal with him ? WHat would you suggest ? I have tried the calm talking , i have tried the reasoning myself to believe its my place , i have tried the screaming , i have tried ignoring. I am at my wits ends and don't know what else i can do. I no longer have time for friends because i have to constantly clean everything,or watch kids , or find a way to make money for myself.I am starting to not have time for my Business because i have to take care of 2 small children on top of it all. I am exhausted nearly all the time , and when i do have energy my husband wants to go out shopping etc. which is treacherous with two kids and horridly long when i have things i would like to do. I feel like i am supposed to be a mom , housekeeper , businesswoman , personal maid , and to end it all somehow supposed to still desire relations at the end of an exhausting night. I need suggestions i would appreciate it.